P nk- Black Brothers Style
by hahollz
Summary: Sirius is away on holiday having a great time while Regulus sits at home and plans his death. Talk of ending ones life, three sums and drug abuse. Though no actual description of sexual encounters.


I_'m lyin' here on the floor where you left me_

_I think I took too much_

He hadn't moved for days, no one had noticed. His father had been ill since Sirius left. He was always the most loved son. Whoever cared for the second, cowardly son anyway? That was never part of the story. The prodigal son was always loved more than the one who stayed. The one who put his whole fucking life on the line just to keep the family happy. The one that would bend to their every fucking whim. Just to be compared to the one who fucking left them. The selfish one who didn't give a fuck, let alone two, for the people who loved him, the people who fucking needed him.

Now Regulus knew, he'd gone too deep trying to keep this fucked family happy. He'd let go of who he was and embraced the fucking darkness. And they didn't notice! Not for a second! They forgot all about him!

And it should have made him angry, or sad, or something. No he just felt… void. That was the only was he could describe it. It was like in the Disc World books, the dead can't feel emotions, they don't have the glands, they can think emotions. He ideally wondered if dark magic had killed of his emotion gland.

_I'm crying here, what have you done?_

_I thought it would be fun_

He got sucked into it all too easily. Promises of family glory, of self-pride, of a little fun. All it had given him so far was self-hatred and a few fucked up dreams. Well more than a few. He hadn't slept in a fortnight, so even if he did chose to move he wouldn't be much good for anything. He'd stopped eating properly a long time ago. Heck he'd started skipping meals when he was fourteen.

They never noticed he was as white as a ghost and as thin as a skeleton.

He finally pulled himself up.

_I can't stay on your life support,_

He moved to the mirror in his room and picked up the straight blade his father had given him on his sixteenth and placed it on the middle of the floor.

_There's a shortage in the switch,_

He went to his bed and took out a leant of rope from underneath and placed it next to the razor blade.

_I can't stay on your morphine,_

He went to his potions cabinet and took out three vials, one labeled rewind, one labeled pause and the last labeled stop. He place them gently on the floor with the razor and the rope.

_'Cause it's making me itch_

His draw was next as he pulled out a contraption a muggle pulled out on him in the last raid, a gum or something. And he put it with the others.

_I said I tried to call the nurse again_

He grabbed his quill and wrote down MIA on one and the coordinates to big ben on the other then added it to the objects on the floor.

_But she's being a little bitch,_

Finally he put his wand down to complete the circle.

_I think I'll get outta here, where I can_

He took the empty bottle of fire whisky he'd drank the night before and placed it down with in the circal.

_Run just as fast as I can_

He watched as it span faster and faster, he felt the anticipation rise higher in him. This bottle was going to choose his death for him. The bottle he'd stole from Sirius' old secret stash. Sirius was going to choose for him, like he did with everything in his life.

_To the middle of nowhere_

The bottle slowed and Regulus was so excited he started to bounce as he watched it.

_To the middle of my frustrated fears_

Slowly his hands went to where the bottle had stopped. He undid the lid of the bottle that said stop.

_And I swear you're just like a pill_

He took a deep breath in and muttered, "Raise your glass dear brother," then emptied the bottle in to his mouth.

_Instead of makin' me better,_

_You keep makin' me ill_

_You keep makin' me ill_

_I'm comin' up so you better get this party started_

_I'm comin' up so you better get this party started_

Sirius Black was loving his year off. Just him, his three best mates and Lily Evens making chaos in every town they stop. Heck nothing could make this year better, well except the news of his mother's death but that wasn't going to happen any time soon.

Everywhere they had gone had been a Party. And most days they woke up having to fill each other in on what they'd forgot. Remus was the best at that. They guy could put twice as much as the rest of us away and still have crystal clear memories of the night before. And they guy was as skinny as a pole.

At first when James had said he wanted to bring his girlfriend along, well Sirius thought the year out would turn to one of sightseeing and learning. But the normally bookish girl had decided after a year of war and the loss of her parents going out and enjoying themselves was a must. A year to unwind.

_Making my connection as I enter the room_

_Everybody's chilling as I set up the groove_

The five of them where on the dance floor in… well Sirius actually have no idea, snorted some fairy dust a hour ago and he was surprised he'd managed to keep both feet on the floor let alone remember anything. He could just feel the beat going through him, controlling him to move.

He locked eyes on to a pretty girl standing quite close to him. She moves toward him dancing with him. Then James moves behind her and the three of them dance. Sirius briefly wondered why James was dancing with them with Lily around. Till he noticed the girl between them _was_ Lily.

_Pumpin' up the volume with this brand new beat_

_Everybody's dancing and they're dancing for me_

The songs kept changing, heck they might have even went to a different club but the three of them kept dancing. They didn't know nor care where Remus or Petter was. Just more shots and dancing, this was the last night of their yearlong party, nothing really mattered tonight.

Sirius picked up another shot, in his he'd he could have sorwn he heard someone say, _raise your glass dear brother._ He necked the shot just in time for lips to meet his. As he pulled back he saw it was James, and for some reason he really didn't care.

_I'm your operator, you can call anytime_

_I'll be your connection to the party line_

The three of them fell on to the mattress and James looked at both of the others in a sort of pleading way.

"Well that was an odd night," Lily chuckled looking at the mortified expression on her boyfriend's face.

"Odd!" James looked as though he could have thought of a million other ways to describe the night, and odd was the understatement. "I slept with my best mate, that's a little more than odd Lils."

"Your forgetting about the pretty young thing that was in the middle," Sirius laughed as he lit up a cigarette. "Plus it was the last night of holiday, had to make it unforgettable."

"But… where like brothers!"

"The _like_ in that sentence really is the key word," Sirius scrunched up his nose. "It was a fun night."

"And guess what we're having more fun now that we're done, tonight," Lily smiled as she cuddled up in-between the two boys. "No not that fun, Mel and Fabien's Hen and Stag does are on when we get back."


End file.
